I think it’s good that he has an outlaw name, because Jesse James must be some kind of criminal dickhead to cheat on a woman like Sandra Bullock. Jesse, have you taken a look at your wife lately? You mean to tell me you find some overly-tattooed on-line bimbo sexier and kinder than that gorgeous sweetheart with whom you are lucky to even share the air, never mind be married to? Oh my, how do you cheat on a woman like Sandra Bullock?I want a show of hands from all the lesbians out there: If Sandra Bullock had committed her life to you and your kids, loving them as if they were her own, would you go out and cheat on her? Or would you be hopelessly in love with the woman until the end of time? If she switched teams and wanted YOU, would you not rent the very last U-HAUL of your life to move her in forever, till death do-eth you part?
Jesse, my boy, the lady is G-O-R-G-E-O-U-S, inside and out. You, my friend, are a schmuck.
There have been many reactions publicized in the news lately about Jesse’s “alleged” affairs, but my favorite by far is from Kim Zolciak of Real Housewives of Atlanta who writes:
“… castrate him.
While Sandra has not publicly said how she will react to her husband's cheating scandal, Kim said that she thinks Sandra should castrate Jesse.
"She should cut his whole package off. Light it like a fire cracker and blow it off," RadarOnline.com quoted Kim as saying on Friday as she arrived at Los Angeles International Airport.
Kim, who recently admitted she's bisexual and is involved with DJ Tracy Young, doesn't know Bullock, but that does not stop her from extending support to the The Blind Side star.
"She's an angel I don't know her personally but it sucks. It's heartbreaking,” said Kim.
"Cut his (bleep) off. She should cut his (bleeps) off and his (bleep).And she should blow it up," she added.”
You go, Kim, cut his (BLEEP) off, and yes, firecracker the WHOLE effing package.
I love you, Sandra, and I’m here for you if you want to start over again, UHAUL at the ready!
For more on Kim's story read here.
Cindy Zelman
Cindy, You are brilliant and while I may not be a lesbian, I wouldn't turn Sandra Bullock and her u-haul away. Shame on that schmuck!
ReplyDelete*Raises both hands*
ReplyDeleteThere are two women deeply committed women in this household and we concur - for the likes of Sandra Bullock, we'd instantly become polygamists, no questions asked.
In fact, if there was no u-haul currently available at the local depot, we'd carry her furniture PIECE BY PIECE, down the street. I kid you not.
I'm trying to post from my phone so I hope this works. First, Hannah, your words mean so much to me and please keep reading.
ReplyDeleteKiera, wish I'd thought of that great line about moving Sandra's furniture piece by piece. I raise my hands with y'all.
Cindy